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Monday, November 10, 2008

Thank you Grandpa


In the kitchen, just at my eye level, hangs this portrait of my maternal grandparents. Look closely and see how uncannily Grandpa's eyes look into yours. His heart looks right out straight out at you and he was a great-hearted man. He would do anything he could for you. When your car broke down, (and I drove a series of the worst cars in the world when I was young), he would be the one to call to come and rescue you, any time, any place. The ride home might be scarier than a ten-mile roller coaster, because he had his own personal approach to the highway, but he was there when you needed him. My brothers and I grew up running tame in their house while my folks went to antique shows and such. I learned to ride a bike on the dirt road in front of the house, picked strawberries out of the lawn, and made huge armies of maple twirler horses under the silver maples across the street. Their home was as much home to me as anywhere else on earth.

He used to delight in taking grand kids out to his garage, where he had saved every bent nail, every interesting old bottle, every strange electronic gadget that he had ever come across. He was a worker, oh, what a worker. When he retired from a life of hard labor in the tanneries, he took on part time jobs to fill his time.
Four of them.
I think he worked more hours in retirement than he did when he kept regular employment. He built their snug and welcoming house from used lumber and straightened nails. After he and grandma passed on I used to drive down their street just to go past it and remember.
It broke my heart when the neighbors bought it and tore it down.

He still found time to grow rhubarb and currants and to climb up ladders when he should have been in his rocking chair.
Had to change the storm windows you know.
And he hated to ask.
The boss didn't get to enjoy the wonders of grandparents, due to early deaths and lasting feuding in his family...so he shared mine. They just loved him and he them. We used to take them fruit and cuts of veal that we had raised and stay on their porch and talk for hours. Although Grandpa was never one to just sit around, they would cut their Sunday travels short if they thought we would be stopping by.

He died when Liz was a baby. She is the only one of the kids to have had the chance to know him, but she got to sit on his knee like I did as a toddler and "ride horsey" to you-pa-de-ah-de-ah-dah, his grandbaby bouncing song. I don't think she remembers but I do. Alan may not have known him, but he got his long bony legs in the genetic lottery and my youngest baby brother inherited his kindness and doing for others mind set. They both remind me so much of him in so many ways....

Anyhow, every day when I fix my coffee, he and grandma are right there between the stove and the microwave. He is always staring right into my eyes, willing me to hang in there for another day. To get by somehow. And every day I talk to him in my mind, thanking him for the daily encouragement and the endless support when I was young and needed it so much.

Today as I stirred my Tasters Choice and thought back at him, it came to me, yes, Grandpa, you are right. You and Grandma and my other grandparents, whose portrait hangs on the other side of the stove, came through worse than we are facing now. The Great Depression, war that killed your friends and family and shook the foundations of the world, deprivations and deaths that would probably stop most folks today dead in their tracks. And yet, right to the end of your days, your life was one of cheerful service and freely-given love. You knew how to be happy with small things and to share what you had with others. Thanks for being there for me when I was young and silly and for still holding me up today. Just thanks.

19 comments:

  1. Anonymous6:26 AM

    Oh, threecollie, thanks so much for sharing this. It reminds me of my paternal grandmother, who was the love of my life ... and I of hers, as her only granddaughter. We all called her "DeeDee" - which came from the song she sang when she bounced us on her knee!

    She was orphaned as a pre-teen, and married my grandfather young. He was not an easy man, so she, too, knew of the hardships of life, but always had a twinkle in her eye. She died when I was 10, and I still have days when I wish I could talk to her.

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  2. Anonymous6:38 AM

    And I'll echo the "thanks" for sharing this. I needed the reminders that my (and the world's) current situation really isn't so dire when compared to others. You pass along your grandfather's legacy when you share it with us.

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  3. A beautiful tribute to very deserving people. Thank you for sharing their story and yours. Such wonderful memories you have growing up in such a loving, extended family. So many families just aren't like that anymore.

    They had the right attitude about life - a good lesson for all of us.

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  4. So beautiful Threecollie!

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  5. A sweet, heartfelt tribute 3C. I was blessed with all 4 wonderful grandparents up into my late 20's so I have similar memories and gratitude.

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  6. A wonderfully written tribute. You were lucky to have someone from his generation that you could count on.

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  7. I do remember him a little bit. Not well just little things.

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  8. TC, you made me cry - what a beautiful post.

    Thanks.

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  9. Great post!

    I never got to meet but one grandparent and she died when I was very little. I have just a real vague memory of her.

    We have two grandsons with us now, and their parents, as they get moved into another life out here with us. It's wonderful to have them.

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  10. What a wonderful post! Thank you for sharing this. It opens up who you are and share even more of you with us.

    Grandparents and grandchildren are what unconditional love really is all about.

    Linda
    http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com

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  11. What a beautiful tribute and heritage.

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  12. Thanks 3C. Your writing brought my own gramps closer to me today.
    XOXO
    Joce

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  13. That was a very moving post. Thank you for sharing the memory.

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  14. Anonymous9:38 PM

    Yes, I could see what you mean about his eyes. Lovely memories, threecollie, thank you so much for sharing them. A blessing that some of us have been fortunate to really know our grandparents.

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  15. akagaga, How sad that you lost her when you are so young. I'm glad you keep your memories though. She sounds very special

    NW, the thought honestly came to me when I was looking into his eyes while I made my coffee. We obviously have forgotten most of the wisdom that his generation gathered and so are doomed to repeat history, but they did survive and prosper. I am glad I was lucky enough to know them

    Deb, thanks, they were so good to me and as a kid I really didn't appreciate it anywhere near enough.

    Dani, thanks so much

    FC, me too. I even got to know my great grandfather who immigrated from Ireland. Ad a kid I didn't realize how blessed I was...thought everybody had a dozen cool aunts and uncles and doting grandparents who had dinner at their house ever Sunday...who knew?

    Apple, I was incredibly lucky in my extended family...took me a while to appreciate it, but I sure do now.

    Paints, maybe you do...


    Nita, sorry, but thanks so much for your kind words.

    JB, sorry that you missed out on grandparents....they are wonderful.

    LInda, well said and thank you.

    Jan, thanks!

    Joce, thanks, I'm glad if I could

    Thanks Jeffro, he was so good to me and to everyone really

    Teri, thanks, I was so lucky..the oldest grand kid on both sides, you can't imagine the spoiling I came in for. I was just a toddler when I got in a heated discussion over possession of him with a cousin who came from another state to meet her grandpa for the first time. As far as I was concerned, he wasn't her grandpa. He was MINE! lol

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  16. Anonymous8:06 PM

    yup i got the 32-34 genes.

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  17. Anonymous4:40 AM

    Frad ,you have a way about you. Tears in my eyes heart in throat. What a post!!! I have the same type of memories but different!!
    Thanks
    Ilove you so
    Matt

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  18. Thanks, Matt, this post has been brewing in the back of my mind for at least a year. The other day it just popped out, all hatched so to speak. He was awful good to me you know...Love you too little brother. have a great day!

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