I Guess

If I didn't have a heart attack yesterday I am probably not going to have one right away.

I got sick of the bull not having any water. The water tub the boss gave him was too small and I was always filling it. And he is a snorty, snotty little bugger and I don't like going around him, but I had to get right up close to fill his tub every day.. I decided to take action, by myself, as no one was home but me. Mistake. Big mistake.

I put a big water tub in with him and filled it. The whole time I was running the hose the little creep was threatening me. As soon as it was full he drank what he wanted and then started working it over with his head...thank God he doesn't have horns.

An hour later I went out to check him and he had broken out the top board of his pen (which had previously been cracked) and was only held in by boards up to his brisket. All he had to do to get out was step over...he wouldn't have even had to lift his feet very high.

I called the boss, who was taking some paper work to his aunt, and stood on the porch with a stick, hoping to not see him rambling down the driveway before help arrived.

He stayed in at least and the guys moved him over to the cow barn on a halter. It was pretty much of a rodeo. He is just a little bull, but he is not nice, no sirree.

We were going to put him in a pen with some heifers, but decided instead to put him in a stanchion and put a ring in his nose....which was done. We were kind of concerned about what he might do if he jumped out or tore up another pen.

He greeted me when I went in to milk last night with threatening bellows and snorting. I was really, really, really glad that he was locked up by his head, the stanchion was tied shut and he was sporting a little chain just in case.

Then just as I was putting the machine on Bayliner, Liz let out a yell and I saw (and heard) a wall of brown, thundering down the manger.

That is when, if I was going to have that heart attack, it would have happened.

I screamed for the boss, who milks in the back of the barn and hollered at the girls to get out of the way. And looked for a pitchfork.

Then Liz called over, "Mom, it's not the bull, it's just Shamrock."

Shamrock is about the same size as the bull and she was having a field day racing up and down the barn, but she is just a Jersey heifer. It took a while, because she was having fun, but Liz caught her and put her out in a pen with her half sister, Shameless, who was put there to make room for the bull.

Time for a sigh of relief, right?

Heck no! In all the excitement, my cow Asaki (read that out loud....Rebecca named her in a name the calf contest a while back) blew out of her stanchion and little Cinnamon jumped through a stall and in with her great big yearling older sister, Rio.

Fun, fun, fun. Asaki ran up the back manger. Cinnamon was terrified, although thankfully Rio was a real lady about the whole affair and just licked her little sister. It took a while before everybody was caught and put back where they belong.

I am too old for this. I was ALWAYS too old for this. Where do I get my (one way) ticket to some place with a beach, something cold with a little umbrella, and maybe some interesting shells and fish and birds? I think I am ready. No, scratch that. I KNOW I am ready.